Who do I want to BE during COVID-19?

Updated: Apr 8, 2020

Show notes summary for Episode 18: Blooming Podcast | click the link to hear the full episode

We are going to discuss how we can become aware of our actions to see if we are being the person we want to be during this COVID-19 crisis.   Because there is a lot of panic and blame going around right now.  Why does this even matter?  Well it’s because panic and blame are actions based out of fear and for us to help others and to make positive impactful change we need to become aware of our own actions.  once we become aware of what we are thinking and doing, that’s really the first step to change but then HOW do we start thinking differently? or behaving differently?  That’s the hard part. I’ve got one of my favorite guests back here on the show also to help us out. she's wellness expert and health coach Monica Lopera Nassar and she’s a wealth of knowledge and she’s going to give us some tips on how we can start creating healthy habits that allow us to take control of our emotions and our lives so we can be the person we really want to be.

So who do you want to be during the COVID-19 crisis?  

You may not even realize you are being anything other than a concerned citizen, so let’s just take a look at these types of actions and how they are different depending on which place you are in. The  FEAR zone, LEARNING zone or the GROWTH zone.

People in the Fear zone are operating from that place of fear.  

There’s no judgement because we all have that place of fear inside us and fear is rooted deep in our subconscious mind, it triggers that flight or fight response and puts us in survival mode.  And we are living in a pandemic right now so it is very likely that most of us are in a FEAR zone right now.  And you’ll see by some of these actions how staying in the fear zone is not going to help.  

As a realtor, many of us are in the fear zone right now.  We are 100% commission based and home sales have dropped right now due to the fact that we can’t have any open houses or do business the way we’re used to.  There are still a handful of homes that are still selling but with all of the panic and the news right now it would be very easy for me to fall into the trap of the fear zone and spend all of my time worried about when this is going to be over and when we will be able to have open houses and showings again. But instead I have to stop myself and move actively my thoughts into a learning or growth zone.  So what is that?  

Learning zone is the next zone.  It takes some awareness that you are operating in the fear zone to actually come out of it.  You choose to learn more and shift what your actions are accordingly.  It’s a place where you are starting to gain more control of your emotions and you can come from a place of learning a more calm rather than being someone stuck in fear. 

So in my example I just gave where I could be a realtor who is stuck in the fear zone complaining or talking about my worry and all that does is cause more fear and worry around me.  How are my clients supposed to feel if I’m giving off that bad energy?  Are they going to want to continue working with me?  No, being stuck in the fear zone breaks trust and my clients will not be reassured so they will likely halt all decisions and start to feel anxious themselves.  See how this is dangerous because fear is actually contagious and that can grow and it really paralyzes people and keeps them stuck.  Now I’m not suggesting that we don’t acknowledge the crisis around us, I’m just saying that acting out of fear doesn’t help.  And for some people pausing or taking a harder look at their own reasons for moving still might be the correct thing to do for them, but it needs to be decisions based off of facts, data not a reaction from their realtor that is worried about the market right now.     Fear after all makes good people hoard toilet paper which is a huge bummer for everyone who now can’t buy it. like me.  So let’s all try to become aware when we are starting to act out of fear.  

So, what I would do if I’m in the learning zone, is that I’m going to stop watching the news all the time, and start trying to figure out which news is true and which isn’t and try not to be so reactive.  As a realtor, I’m spending a lot of time learning about all the new documents that the National Association of Realtors has created to protect buyers and sellers when closings can’t happen on schedule so that I can advise my clients and help them by giving them information so they can make better decisions for themselves.  They have added special contingencies for COVID in case people are in escrow and have lost their jobs or are now unable to get financing.   So being in the learning phase means I’m not going to stay stuck in the anxiety of it all, I’m going to start learning more about the situation and seeing what information applies to me and my clients.  I’m also going to start becoming more aware of my feelings and how I’m speaking with people and sharing information. 

Because if we can get into the Growth zone that is when we can start to help and create positive impact in the middle of a crisis.  

Growth zone is where we are learning to adapt.  We find our one thing that we can do to help and work on that.  We show we care by being the calm in the storm.  We show empathy for ourselves and others and we look for the silver lining and are grateful for what we have.   In my life, I’m really trying to do this every night.  I know I spoke about this in the last episode, but it really does help and it gets you into the growth zone.  So in my realtor example, I’m with compass and it’s such an awesome company.  They have put their creative minds together to offer their agents a whole suite of virtual marketing tools to help our clients who still need to buy or sell during this crisis. There’s still people that need to sell and there are still folks that need to buy - so we have to be the ones that can help figure this out for them in a way that is safe for everyone.  Besides virtual open houses or showings we have virtual interactive brochures and virtual neighborhood walks, live virtual buyer events and more.  It’s pretty awesome to see how creative people can be. Being in the growth zone means that out of chaos and out of catastrophe - good things can happen.

So I feel like this is a lot of information I just threw at you and you might be thinking that sounds good and all but how can I really apply this to my life?  Well I’ve got my good friend and health expert Monica here to help us out.  She’s a health coach here in North San Diego county and she’s a wealth of knowledge when it comes to family health and best practices to start creating the life you really want.  She’s got a whole slew of free info on her instagram and her website is also loaded with goodies you can take advantage of. Her company is called Calibrate your wellness and you you can find her at calibrate your wellness.com She specializes in helping young families and pregnant woman with her amazing right from the start program.  So I’ve brought monica here on the show so she can help us all learn how to put this into practice.  To hear the full interview click on this link.

To Recap:

We talked about getting out of the fear zone and into the learning and growth zones.  If you want to see typical actions you might take when you are in these zones, check out my blog post because I have all the info and the chart there for you in case you want to see which zone you are in most of the day.    I’m so glad Monica was here today, she helped us by letting us know that we can take more control of our lives and emotions by understanding what our interpretation of each situation is.  It’s so empowering because it allows you to be in the drivers seat of your life instead of being a victim of circumstance.  So start by paying attention and becoming aware of your thoughts and when you are noticing that you are getting reactive, pause a moment and take a small little break to think about your interpretation of the situation and see if you can reframe it differently that supports you better.   Stress and anxiety isn’t a normal way of living, it’s a choice of the interpretation of your circumstance, so choose to have interpretations that serve you better.  

Other Healthy habits that we can start that helps supports positivity in our lives:

  • getting enough sleep at night

  • a night time wind down routine

  • not eating 2 hours before you go to bed

  • drinking enough water and your vitamins throughout the day

  • and remembering to take breathing breaks also helps. Take 4 deep breaths that fill your belly.

All of these habits help support you and will give you the ability to think clearly and be in that more positive state of mind.  

I hope you found this helpful! If you liked this episode you should check out last weeks show: COVID-19 Stress? How to be calm in uncertain times.